I haven't had much to say lately. My phone and I are having a very tumultuous relationship. The device is reaching end-of-life and I'm getting to the point where I am starting to reevaluate my commitment to our relationship. I downloaded the Android 2.2 manual update for it and installed it, and for the moment, we're on a second honeymoon (everything is so much FASTER. I still can't use it to accomplish much of anything, but I can send texts that say "lol" in AT LEAST 0.3 seconds less than before) but even this will end, and I'll be unable to keep my drooling over new Android devices contained.
It must have caught me looking at some Droid X specs pages, because I'm pretty sure it's exacting revenge on me. A couple days ago, I just touched the faceplate of the case I had on it and it snapped right in two. I thought that would be an isolated incident, but it clearly wasn't. I signed on this morning to find that Perez Hilton has been so wisely selected by Motorola as a promotion vehicle for their new Droid X. The Droid X used to look kind of like a super version of my phone. Now I just see it as dirty whore that will call me fat and try to take inappropriate pictures of me at night and add captions like "LOL, lovehandles!" and "omg, acne alert" after uploading them to a blog with seemingly hundreds of thousands of rabid readers.
While I was thinking about that, I started to think about what it would be like if Perez Hilton was handed a developer kit and all of the parts necessary to make a phone and was allowed to build his own cell phone alone.
I came up with this...
I will disregard the likely fact that an app somewhat like this already exists somewhere and stay curled up in my safety ball of ignorance.
But seriously, Perez Hilton? Motorola thinks it's a good idea to associate themselves with a guy who managed to make a career out of calling female celebrities that way more than 110 pounds "fat" when he is noticeably overweight himself? The same guy that thinks it's hilariously clever to post candid shots of celebrities on the internet and make obnoxious little tooltips next to everything marking out their every flaw? If I buy a Motorola product now, is it going to call me fat? Is it going to disallow me from using it if I have eaten over 500 calories in the past 48 hours? Is it automatically going to set this picture as my wallpaper?
These are valid concerns.
